Tag Archives: make ‘em squeal

The Joni Ernst Watch 10/19/2015

When it comes to Joni “Make ‘em squeal” Ernst or Steve King it’s clown shoes all day, every day. Recently, the conversation in Iowa has turned away from our homegrown whack-a-doos and focused on the nutcase circus that will be the Republican caucus.

Steve King is really enjoying his moment in the sun as the right wing clown car is circling the state of Iowa trying to get his endorsement in some misguided faith that it represents true political gravitas. Given his new popularity, King has really been mouthing off lately which for him is saying something considering his past statements about…um, everything.

Apparently, he does not believe Muslims can assimilate into American culture:

But I can’t find models of the folks that, say, do the hajj to Mecca, I can’t find models where they’ve assimilated into the broader culture of civilization wherever they’ve gone.

What does this puffed up joker even mean by the words he speaks? I am guessing that he wants to see instances where Muslims came to a new country, renounced their faith, and became Christian. That might satisfy him.

He just couldn’t let things go and like right wing icon Joe Arpaio King decided to let loose his love of tents in the desert:

Then send them into Saudi Arabia, where they have the air-conditioned tents at Mecca. Those tents are not busy for 11 months out of the year, and they would assimilate into that civilization like a hand into a glove.

This is the same guy who thinks that voters will reward the Republican Party in November 2016 with even more leadership authority based on their excellent stewardship over the last couple of years. Good luck with that.

When confronted with conflicting realities most Republican candidates are best advised to just turtle. It will be better for your brand. Take Ted Cruz. The Calgary, Canada born senator from Texas recently spewed some right wing garbage about immigration and deportation while standing in front of a bible verse that is commonly interpreted to be about helping immigrants.

Maybe Steve King just needs to jump on the Trump bandwagon. In Nevada Trump is leading with 38% of the vote in recent polling.

One of the great tropes of the right wing is that the Jews were persecuted because they did not resist the pogroms of Nazi Germany. Never mind that this was the same militaristic state that crushed the combined armies of the France and the United Kingdom in stunning fashion. Keith Ablow, who somehow still manages to make people watching Fox News believe he has some kind of authority on some topics, really doubled down:

Granted, hindsight is 20/20. But it turns out it was a bad idea for any Jew to have turned over a gun. It was a bad idea for any Jew to have boarded a train. It was a bad idea for any Jew to have passed through a gate into a camp. It was a bad idea for any Jew to do any work at any such camp. It was a bad idea for any Jew to not attempt to crush the skull or scratch out the eyes of any Nazi who turned his back for one moment. And every bullet that would have been fired into a Nazi coming to a doorway to confiscate a gun from a Jew would have been a sacred bullet.

Sure Keith, a police state backed by a modern military was going to back down from a core belief because someone owned a handgun.

The Joni Ernst Watch 10/5/2015

When it comes to Joni “Make ‘em squeal” Ernst or Steve King it’s clown shoes all day, every day. Recently, the conversation in Iowa has turned away from our homegrown whack-a-doos and focused on the nutcase circus that will be the Republican caucus.

Representatives Steve King and Rod Blum—both of Iowa and both of questionable judgment—voted against the continuing resolution to keep the government operating.

It is always a good idea to elect people to government whose sole mission is to see how bad they can run the government.

Steve King cannot figure out why Planned Parenthood remains popular:

I haven’t paid any attention to the polls. But am I surprised? Yes. That would explain some of the reasons why the leadership is not committing to defund.

Maybe the reason lies in the fact that Planned Parenthood provides a lot of services to women that would go unmet if the organization were defunded? But keep banging that drum. Over and over again.

However, Steve King is not as bad as House Oversight Committee Chair Jason Chaffetz who presented this horrible, no good, very bad graph:

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See the problem? That’s right. In Republican World 327,000 is bigger than 935,573. Your “liberal math facts” do not apply when there is hay to be made with right wingers.

Chaffetx probably learned how to make graphs and present “facts” from the same jokers who put on the Values Voters Summit. The final session of the recent conference was entitled “How to Argue the Social Issues with Liberals and Libertarians” and was held in a standing room only conference room.  I find it interesting that the Values Voters Summit is concerned with libertarians as well, but oh well.

Remember, Rush Limbaugh is the standard bearer of what the right wing believes. Limbaugh now postulates that NASA is just a tool for “Muslim outreach.”   I do not even know what to say in response to logic smackdowns like that.

The Joni Ernst Watch 9/28/2015

When it comes to Joni “Make ‘em squeal” Ernst or Steve King it’s clown shoes all day, every day. Recently, the conversation in Iowa has turned away from our homegrown whack-a-doos and focused on the nutcase circus that will be the Republican caucus.

Joni Ernst has been quiet lately, but maybe she has just been drowned out by the circus that is the Republican party these days. It looks like she is going to take a stab at rolling back clean water rules.

Does Steve King think he is “man-splaining” to Pope Francis:

I think that it would be better for the Vatican to focus more on theology, and less on this thing that they’ve now had to have a name change from global warming to climate change.

Then again, King just seems to hate on everybody:

The people on our side who pay any attention to this at all understand sharia is incompatible with the Constitution and that a sincerely devout Muslim — I might say, a devout Islamist — cannot seriously give an oath to support the Constitution, because it’s incompatible with his faith.

So, John Boehner just up and quit. No seriously, he behaved just like everybody’s fat, racist friend on South Park Eric Cartman:

cartman-screw-you-guys

Jeb! does not like multiculturalism very much:

We should not have a multicultural society.

Well, that was emphatic.

God damn, Sarah Palin is a moron.

BTW, who hasn’t confused Leonardo da Vinci with Leonardo DiCaprio?

The Joni Ernst Watch 9/21/2015

When it comes to Joni “Make ‘em squeal” Ernst or Steve King it’s clown shoes all day, every day. Recently, the conversation in Iowa has turned away from our homegrown whack-a-doos and focused on the nutcase circus that will be the Republican caucus.

Consitution Day came and went on September 17th…what, you did not throw a party? Steve King was not going to let the day go by without issuing a statement. Naturally, it was full of Republican word soup like founding fathers, God, Constitution, God, history, God…you get the idea.

Steve King apparently wants America to look like it did when the Constitution was signed over two hundred years ago. On a talk show with a host known for advocating the modern enslavement of refugees King said this on the demographics of immigration:

Tell me how you want America to look, because America’s being transformed because of immigration policy and I’m like Ann Coulter, I like the America we had.

What he is really saying is Republican code for “I want to see a white America.”

I wish that I could pull something positive out of Wednesday night’s Republican debate in California. Maybe Rand Paul’s surprisingly accurate statement that the Iraq War was a major mistake and the ramifications of that war are directly tied to the rise of ISIL…ISIS…whatever.

Donald Trump is a bully and a blowhard…and he is exactly who the Republicans deserve after years of coded phrases about liberals being “weak” or “European” or “kind of like the French.” You want a manly man? You got him now and it is a joy to watch. Never mind that this “manly man” has declared bankruptcy several times, is from New York City, and never served in the military. Just saying.

Someone let Chris Christie on the stage and he continued to lie. His favorite trope right now is to claim that he was appointed U.S. attorney on September 10th, 2001. See, he was on the front lines right before the attacks of September 11th. Oh wait, he was actually appointed U.S. attorney on December 7th, 2001. It’s a few months difference, but isn’t that just a technicality among friends?

Let’s just chalk it up to a yelling match on the playground. It did give us some quality reaction shots though:

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Nothing could prepare me for the horror of the post-debate “spin room” where Jezebel’s correspondent was brave enough to tread.

The Joni Ernst Watch 9/14/2015

When it comes to Joni “Make ‘em squeal” Ernst or Steve King it’s clown shoes all day, every day. Recently, the conversation in Iowa has turned away from our homegrown whack-a-doos and focused on the nutcase circus that will be the Republican caucus.

Steve King is really going after birthright citizenship. Now he seems to think that Congress can act to end the policy which is enshrined in an amendment to the Constitution:

The people who say that the Constitution has to be amended in order to end birthright citizenship are invariably the people who think it’s a good idea.

Rick Perry is out of the race. Not that he was ever really in the race, but he is out nonetheless. The Republican clown car made a stop at the Iowa-Iowa State football game on Saturday with Donald Trump, Ran Paul, Marco Rubio and Scott Walker attending a “tailgate.”

Joni was there and said she would not endorse any candidate, which really means that she does not want to pick a losing horse at this early stage. No one wants to be the person who backed Rick Perry. Or Jeb!

My favorite moment from the tailgate in Ames was the greeting offered to Donald Trump versus the one offered to Scott Walker. Trump was greeted like a rock star. Walker was essentially a non-entity as the raucous crowd cheered for Trump. Good luck governor white bread.

It’s not like Scott Walker would have said anything of substance since he takes three positions on every issue in order to appeal to every possible voter. He also does not like the hypothetical question “If you were president…?”

You know, it’s not like he’s running to be the leader of the freaking free world or anything.

Chris Christie is still in the race, but his polling suggests that he may be the next candidate to drop out because no one actually wants to see this man in the Oval Office. Why? Because he is a bully who has no grip on reality. When asked about his own comments on climate change he chose the bully route again and lied through his teeth.

Rick Santorum is apparently still running for the Republican presidential nomination, but he almost has to anymore because it is the only way that he stay relevant in the eyes of the chattering class that stays glued to Fox News for a dozen hours a day. You know, people like your retired uncle who screams about Hillary and the “liberals ruining America.”

Just like that uncle, Santorum does not like diversity in America.

He also does not believe in climate change because he is a moron.

Sarah Palin wants to be Trump’s Secretary of Energy. Would she quit halfway through his first term in order to star in a reality television show and appear on Fox News to vomit out some lukewarm talking points?

The truly saddest moment in the last week was when Mike Huckabee actually said that the precedent set by the Dred Scott decision was still the law of the land in the United States:

Because that’s their phrase, ‘it’s the law of the land. Michael, the Dred Scott decision of 1857 still remains to this day the law of the land which says that black people aren’t fully human. Does anybody still follow the Dred Scott Supreme Court decision?

Like Rick Santorum, Huckabee has a flimsy grasp of how American civics works. Dred Scott is not the law of the land because of the Emancipation Proclamation and the Thirteenth Amendment. I realize that Republicans have a hard time with the Constitution once things get past the Second Amendment, but it would do them some good to actually read the entire document.

However, the lowest point of the week comes from Louisiana. In the effort to defund Planned Parenthood, because Bobby Jindal needs something to hang his hat on other than his actual record, legislators have claimed that there are 2,000 family planning providers willing to provide services in the absence of Planned Parenthood. Great, right? In the list of 2,000 family planning providers were included “ophthalmologists; nursing homes caregivers; dentists; ear, nose, and throat doctors; and even cosmetic surgeons.”

Come to Louisiana where your dentist can prescribe your birth control. Somehow I do not see that making it on to the welcome signs.

The Joni Ernst Watch 8/31/2015

When it comes to Joni “Make ‘em squeal” Ernst or Steve King it’s clown shoes all day, every day. Recently, the conversation in Iowa has turned away from our homegrown whack-a-doos and focused on the nutcase circus that will be the Republican caucus.

I do not know if Steve King is a betting man, but I would wager that he is wrong about Donald Trump’s odds of receiving the Republican nomination:

Trump is more likely to receive the Republican nomination than Hillary is to receive the Democrat nomination for president.

Of course, this is the same Steve King who said there was nothing for the United States to apologize for when it came to the issue of slavery.

In a world where Donald Trump is the leader in the clubhouse for the Republican Party it is hard to beat him for moron of the week, but Jeb! managed to pull it off. It looks like he decided to jump on the “anchor baby” bandwagon, but chose to lay blame at the feet of Asians:

What I was talking about was the specific case of fraud being committed where there’s organized efforts—and frankly it’s more related to Asian people—coming into our country, having children, in that organized efforts, taking advantage of a noble concept, which is birthright citizenship. I support the 14th amendment. Nothing I’ve said should be viewed as derogatory toward immigrants at all.

You have to wonder if Marco Rubio is just sitting back and hoping that all of these old white dudes out idiot each other.

Donald Trump is the unrestrained id of the right wing. He does and says things that people like Ted Cruz, Marco Rubio, and Rand Paul want to but just cannot muster the courage to do. Just take his latest mocking of an immigrant group:

Negotiating with Japan, negotiating with China … (he then folded his hands over his middle).

“When these people walk in the room, they don’t say, ‘Oh, hello! How’s the weather? It’s so beautiful outside. Isn’t it lovely? How are the Yankees doing? Oh they’re doing wonderful. Great.”

(He then scowled dramatically.)

“They say, ‘We want deal!'” Trump bellowed.

Naturally, the crowd ate it up. Remember, Trump supporters are a lot like this guy who told Jorge Ramos to “get out of my country.” Never mind that Jorge Ramos is in his country because he is a U.S. citizen. Do you want to know who is really behind the Trump mania? Take a look at the cabal of lawyers behind ending birthright citizenship.

Maybe we just all fear the Trumpcabra.

Ted Cruz, feeling like Donald Trump has stolen all of his thunder, decided to take his own shot at Megyn Kelly because she deigned to ask him a question about his intentions if he were president.

I guess that is one of those “gotcha questions” that Sara Palin used to talk about all the time.

Scott Walker did not want Donald Trump to get all of the attention for being an idiot when it comes to immigration. Walker decided it was high time to get tough on Canada by building a wall:

They raised some very legitimate concerns, including some law enforcement folks that brought that up to me at one of our town hall meetings about a week and a half ago. So that is a legitimate issue for us to look at.

Legitimate? Really? Give Scott Walker a week and he will take three positions on any issue.

John Kasich has a lot of problems, not 99 but somewhere close to that, and his record with regard to education is just one of them. Apparently, Ohio charter schools were a sham that funneled money to private corporations at the expense of children’s education.

Bobby Jindal is running for president. Does anyone remember that? As the ten year anniversary of Hurricane Katrina rolled around he wrote a letter to President Obama telling him not to mention climate change.

The Joni Ernst Watch 8/24/2015

When it comes to Joni “Make ‘em squeal” Ernst or Steve King it’s clown shoes all day, every day. Recently, the conversation in Iowa has turned away from our homegrown whack-a-doos and focused on the nutcase circus that will be the Republican caucus.

Steve King thinks that Donald Trump is the best:

I think today he is the leader on immigration. There’s no question about that.

You have to wonder when the right wing of the right wing is going to snap out of its Trump mania. It might never actually happen. However, Steve King is right there with Trump when it comes to getting extreme on immigration and citizenship:

The people who say that the Constitution has to be amended in order to end birthright citizenship are invariably the people who think it’s a good idea — and those who think it’s a good idea generally are the beneficiaries of it.

No, the people who say you need to amend the Constitution are legal scholars who understand how the U.S. federal system works.

But at least Steve King found time to dig into a stick of deep fat fried butter at the Iowa State Fair.

Scott Walker, who has watched his early momentum in Iowa be usurped by the Donald, apparently does not want reporters asking any tough questions. Walker now has his staff screen questions before anyone is allowed to ask anything.

John Kasich, competing with a whole bevy of second tier candidates trying to get some spotlight, went al Chris Christie and attacked public teachers. Apparently, the problem with our public school system is unions and teachers’ lounges:

I’ll tell you what the unions do, unfortunately too much of the time. There’s a constant negative comment, ‘They’re going to take your benefits, they’re going to take your pay.’ So if I were, not president, but if I were king in America, I would abolish all teachers’ lounges, where they sit together and worry about, ‘Woe is us.

Carly Fiorina, who is apparently still running for the Republican nomination, wants to get in on some bashing of poor people and laws designed to provide a floor on how bad businesses can treat vulnerable workers:

We are crushing them under the weight, the complexity, the cost, the power of a federal government that frankly advantages the big, the powerful, the wealthy and the well-connected, and is crushing the small and the powerless. Every time we destroy a small business or we destroy a community bank, we are destroying the opportunity for someone to get that first job, learn skills, and get a better job.

We are really crushing companies that are making lots of money while people are on government assistance because wages have stagnated.

The Joni Ernst Watch 8/17/2015

When it comes to Joni “Make ‘em squeal” Ernst or Steve King it’s clown shoes all day, every day. Recently, the conversation in Iowa has turned away from our homegrown whack-a-doos and focused on the nutcase circus that will be the Republican caucus.

It looks like the “smart guy” glasses have done nothing for Rick Perry and he is headed toward another flameout in the Hawkeye state. If rumors are to be believed, Perry has stopped paying his campaign staff. How will he stay in the race? Dark money from a Super PAC of course.

Climate denial is sort of par for the course for the gaggle of Republican aspirants. John Kasich is taking things a step further by advocating a do nothing strategy:

I think that man absolutely affects the environment, but as to whether, what the impact is… the overall impact — I think that’s a legitimate debate.

And:

We don’t want to destroy people’s jobs, based on some theory that is not proven.

Remember, these are the same people who want us to base our laws on a book written in a language no longer commonly spoken and translated several times from that point. Oh, and a lot of the stories are probably apocryphal anyhow but let’s base laws on that piece of literature and not on sound science.

If you really want to understand the strident denial of sound climate science just look at how much money the Republican candidates have received from the fossil fuel industry.  The unlimited dollars allowed via the Citizens United ruling is allowing a small cadre of fossil fuel interests to really shape the Republican presidential field. Granted, since every billionaire has a pet candidate it has led to the entertaining circus side show that has developed.

Bobby Jindal, you remember that he was running for president right, decided to throw some shade at the Democrat’s slate of candidates by saying there is a “soap opera happening on the Democratic side.” Really? The guy who wants to be sharing a stage with Donald Trump is saying that there is a soap opera on the other side of the aisle? No wonder this guy is polling so low. He is clueless.

The Joni Ernst Watch 8/10/2015

When it comes to Joni “Make ‘em squeal” Ernst or Steve King it’s clown shoes all day, every day. Recently, the conversation in Iowa has turned away from our homegrown whack-a-doos and focused on the nutcase circus that will be the Republican caucus.

Joni decided that she was going to go all-in on defunding Planned Parenthood and came up seven votes short. Better luck next time. Instead of licking her wounds in private, the junior senator from Iowa went on the offensive by lashing out at two of the right wing’s favorite targets—Hillary Clinton and Elizabeth Warren:

Women like Hillary Clinton and Elizabeth Warren are really trying to push this and I think this is very, very unfortunate. What are they defending? Are they defending the selling of baby body parts potentially?

I love the passive aggressive tone of the statement. It’s okay to slander someone if you end it in question market right?

Normally, Chuck Grassley does not grace these pages because the long-serving senator from Iowa is pretty bland even when is in attack mode. Unfortunately, he decided to delay the nominations of 20 State Department appointments until Hillary Clinton releases some more emails because…uh, Benghazi? When will these people quit?

Man, I love this guy:

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Not Scott Walker, but Tyler McFarland who was the brave soul who made this picture possible.

Granted, I would love to see someone do the same to Ted Cruz. He apparently thinks that scientists have created climate change:

They’re cooking the books. They’re actually adjusting the numbers. Enron used to do their books the same way.

Wasn’t Enron a poster child for the right wing’s race to deregulate markets across the country? Just saying.

Does anyone remember Sarah Palin? Speaking about Donald Trump she said:

The elites are shocked by Trump’s dominance, but everyday Americans aren’t. Everywhere I’ve gone this summer, including motorsport events in Detroit full of fed-up Joe Six-Pack Americans, the folks I meet commiserate about wussified slates of politicians, but then unsolicited, they whisper their appreciation for Trump because he has the guts to say it like it is.

I love the paint by numbers word salad she always employs. If I bought a six pack of American made craft IPA would I be considered Joe Six Pack American?

The Joni Ernst Watch 8/3/2015

When it comes to Joni “Make ‘em squeal” Ernst or Steve King it’s clown shoes all day, every day. Recently, the conversation in Iowa has turned away from our homegrown whack-a-doos and focused on the nutcase circus that will be the Republican caucus.

Steve King went all…well, Steve King and suggested that the recent Supreme Court ruling on gay marriage opened the door on other, shall we say, alternative unions:

I had a strong, Christian lawyer tell me yesterday that, under this decision that he has read, what it brings about is: It only requires one human being in this relationship — that you could marry your lawnmower with this decision. I think he’s right.

I would love to meet the lawyer who gave Iowa’s favorite member of Congress this stout legal opinion.

This site does not usually post a lot of stuff about the Governor For Life Terry Branstad, but his recent comments about agricultural pollution in Des Moines’ drinking water are most interesting:

The Des Moines Water Works ought to just tone it down and start cooperating and working with others, like Cedar Rapids is doing, and other communities in the state of Iowa

This is an attack on Branstad’s big ag buddies who dump shit into the water of the state of Iowa.  He does not care because their money is green.

Who is ready for the Republican debate this week? I am. Ten of the “top” candidates will get to debate in prime time on Fox News while the other seven candidates will get relegated to the kids table. You have to love a world where Donald Trump is invited to be an adult. The ultimate man child is getting some respect from the establishment. This will end well.

Mike Huckabee cannot stop with comparisons between the recently negotiated nuclear deal with Iran and Nazi Germany.

One, it’s as if reactionaries trying to gain traction in the Republican race to be the nominee are grasping at the most facile of imagery in hopes of moving up the polls. For example, see Donald Trump’s recent rise in standing. Say something inflammatory and get some bump in your numbers.

Second, there is a trend of comparing anything this president does to Nazi Germany. Don’t believe me? Take a moment to look at some of these classic Tea Party signs:

DEB NICKLAY/The Globe Gazette A billboard on South Federal Avenue in Mason City seemingly compares President Barack Obama to Adolph Hitler (left) and Vladimir Lenin.

DEB NICKLAY/The Globe Gazette
A billboard on South Federal Avenue in Mason City seemingly compares President Barack Obama to Adolph Hitler (left) and Vladimir Lenin.

Forget for a moment that the National Socialism was really fascism, which was opposed ideologically to the type of socialism we normally associated with the Soviet Union, China, or Cuba. Semantics, I know.

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What is up with these whack-a-doos?

Coming up we might have our first casualty of the 2016 primary season. Rand Paul, hoping to grab some of his dad’s libertarian grassroots magic, Rand 2016 is on the ropes

Given that his stump speeches sound like something written by a junior in high school running to be senior class president you have to wonder how he got this far:

I’ve told people if I am elected president — or I guess, better yet, when I am elected president — I will do something extraordinary, I won’t try to grab up more power, I will try to give power back to the people and to the states, respectively.

That is some real barn burning rhetoric Rand. Thanks for playing.